Friday, April 23, 2010

Plateaus

I like newness. I like trying new things, developing new skills, making new friends. There is this feeling of growth that is so palpable when things are new. You are growing a relationship that never existed. You are gaining skills that you have never had before, learning things you didn't know, having an experience that you have never had before. It is a richness of experience.

I feel like the past four months, I have been tenacious about seeking after new things, especially goals and talents. I've done lots of things that I have never done before.

At some point, though, there comes a plateau. I am a different person definitely to who I was four months ago, but I don't get the feeling like I am going to be so changed in the next four months. But it makes me think back to a couple years ago when I was running all the time. I would push myself to go however long, and kept trying to run farther and farther, but it was never really easy or great. Then I went to North Dakota, and I was running there, and I ran farther than I ever had, and I just loved the wind, and I loved running. I don't know that I was pushing myself, but I was loving the moment I was in in that very moment.

I expect the noticeability of my growth (at least to myself) will slow, but I hope that I can just enjoy life.

I did yoga today, and as I was doing shavasana (I have no idea how to spell that) at the end, I just lay there and felt superb. Then Prairie, Emily, and Zephyr came over and up, and I just felt this peaceful joy.

Carolyn told me something once that one of her harp teachers told her, that when you feel like you are making the least progress is really when you are making the most. I think of that a lot, especially when I consider the plateau stages of life.

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